Monday, December 17, 2007

Something New

I thought that I would give this a shot and see how it went or how faithful I'd be in writing it. I am somewhat grouchy today. I feel as if I have been put in a pressure cooker for so long that I might burst. I don't know why it is that people take your kindness for weakness and think they can walk all over you. I often find myself trying to be all things to all men and I end up being burnt out in the end. It is like I pour my glass of water to refill everyone else's but the same is unrequited back to me. So I feel empty in the end. It often seems the weak will leech onto the strong and suck every last drop out of them because it is easier for them to do that than stand on their own 2 feet. But I digress.

I long to be the cheery happy go lucky man I once was but it seems that when I put away my childhood to be a man, I also put away my joy. We are taught that we we've have done all we can do to just stand. Sometimes I feel as if I have stood so long I have grown rooted in place and never able to move again. I feel like an immobile punching bag that the world enjoys punching on.

But I am as always alone even in a sea of faces. I am alone because I am a leader and no one else can carry the weight that I can nor is anyone else willing to try...

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